I Don’t Want a Penpal!

It happens all the time! You meet someone that seems great on match.com or whatever site you select. You begin to email each other and you sense you have a lot in common. The emails get longer and longer and you begin to get bored! You rush through the message just to see if he ends it with asking you out and he doesn’t. If you just wanted a penpal you could date a prisoner or someone across the country. But this time you find someone within 20 miles of you and he doesn’t seem to want to come out of the computer. Here is my remedy… Before you even start chatting with someone take a good look at their profile and not just the pictures. If someone has a profile that drags on and on I disqualify that person. If you are bored in just reading their profile I can assure...

Never Date this Type of Guy!

You have met the perfect man! He professes his love within days of contacting you. He has an amazing career, survived a big tragedy in life (typically the death of his wife), he adores children and always wanted a family, he buys you nice gifts and works hard to show you how close the two of you are. He also claims he rarely dates but there is just something so special about you. You finally believe that love might not just be a fantasy. You find it refreshing after all the jerks you have dated in the past. It seems a bit fast but you have rationalized that you deserve this and you believe that you are special! You avoid sharing too many details with your friends because you sense they will discourage you.  You feel a little uneasy but want this to work so badly that you fall into a...

Only Read if You are a Bitch or the Men Who Love Us!

I know there are many who claim men like bitchy women. And truth is that some men do like bitchy women. But I can assure you that the men that like the bitches are not the kind of guys we want to date. I don’t want to get into semantics over legal definitions here. We all need to agree that a bitch is NOT a woman with an opinion or a woman with confidence. A bitch is someone that is always looking for a reason to be miserable. If she doesn’t have anything to complain about she will find or create something. And she only looks forward to her man coming home so she can attempt to make his life as miserable as she is feeling. That is a BITCH!! And truth is I know many of them. I have witnessed friends and neighbors call their husbands at work and vent for 5...

Shallow?

Think back to your first crush… were the earlier crushes that much different from those who you are attracted today? Studies have shown that by the age of 8 we begin to develop “our type”. Honestly, I think mine started even younger. Now I didn’t always date “my type” because I had a lot of desperate years where I would take what I could get.  But my type hasn’t strayed all that much. I never liked the super big muscle guys (although I did date one from match.com). It ended when he confessed that he wanted to be a stripper and texted me some nude poses. That was always a massive turn off. I also never cared much for the super educated, cerebral type. For me I have always liked the funny, quirky guy with the boy next door type of looks. I had a pretty big list of turn...

What Are Your Kids Learning About Love, Dating and Relationships?

I remember having a group of friends over one night when my parents were out for the evening. We found some porn videos in my parent’s night stand, an old bottle of vodka in the bar and had ourselves a little party. We were smart enough to add water to the half empty vodka bottle and put those videos back exactly how they were found. Truth is my mom would not have cared all that much if we got caught! She was always opened to talking about sex at anytime! She was a bit on the wild side and everyone seemed to love that about her, including some of my boyfriends. My Flintstone vitamins turned into birth control pills the day I hit puberty, she answered any questions about sex without reservation and I pretty much knew all I needed to know before the experiences actually happened. Many parents are willing...

It’s Not Complicated, You’ve Been Partially Dumped!

What do I mean by a partially dumped? Well there are 2 types. The most obvious type is when a committed relationship is terminated but the sexual encounters continue. And the less obvious situation is when the physical attraction has died but you still spend time together. Both recipes for disaster, both miserable and both will unlikely ever bring you back to where you once were. Let’s dissect this sexual relationship first! You were once in love, connected with each other every day, your friends knew you as a couple and you knew exactly where the relationship stood. Why did things have to change? Basically because he is wondering what other options are out there. For whatever reason the relationship holds no future but the sex is good. Good sex however is not enough to ensure everlasting love! But it sure is hard to walk away from. So you are broken...

Guys on Match MUST READ!

I am doing a little match.com mentoring for a lovely lady and am quite annoyed by these profiles I am reading. Guys if you could all just fix up your profiles based on my advice I would be able to help my beautiful client find love on match much quicker. Are you ready? STOP posting pictures of your children on match.com. Go right in to your profile and delete any pictures with your kids! Put those on your facebook page. Corny is crap! Don’t say you want to walk through the raindrops with me. My client is not looking to date an asexual poetry teacher here. She wants a man! No offense to the poetry teachers, I am sure many are very good guys. Sorry! But not such a man that you post pictures of yourself sweating or even worse with your shirt off. Trust me if you are cut we can tell...

I Can’t Get Over Him?

You pass his car on the street and your stomach turns to knots, you wake up in the morning and your heart sinks when there is no text message waiting on your phone from him and you have convinced yourself never to date again. It is called a heart break and I have a little news flash for you…people get over this day after day. Sure I understand you are a little special and your situation was somehow a little worse. Trust me I have been through it a million times. First thing you need to realize is that this is only as awful as you convince yourself! For some reason so many people resist believing me on this one but it is so very true! If you walk around day and night saying to yourself “I will never get over this” or “I can’t deal with the pain I am...

Must I Respond to Every Match Email That I Get?

My answer is no! I hear this debate constantly. Surprisingly I hear more men whining and complaining about this then I do women. And I must say that a nagging, whining man is just not very sexy! So guys please let me put this in perspective for you! First of all so many of the guys literally write a 5000 word essay in that ‘about me’ section. Internet dating is so time consuming as it is. If you honestly expect us to read the long boring profile and then take the time to respond and tell you why we are not compatible it is just not going to happen. We are internet dating here. It is understood that you likely sent 25 messages to 25 different women. It is not as if we have some deep meaningful relationship that warrants any type of closure. No response means we are not interested. So...

Ever Date This Type of Guy?

Ladies Have you Ever Dated a Guy Who… Asks you out but seems to be completely unavailable between dates? Invites you to meet him at a restaurant but isn’t clear as to whether it means dinner or drinks? Says he will call you Friday to confirm the date and when you give in and text him on Saturday he acts like it was already confirmed?  Seems interested but the relationship doesn’t seem to be escalating? If you find yourself dating this ambivalent type of guy I imagine you are pretty annoyed! You are excited that he offers to call a day ahead to confirm the date and wait anxiously for the call. Down deep you wonder why he can’t just text or say hello to you prior to the confirmation but you have rationalized this in your head. You create some ridiculous notion that he is busy with the kids or taking it slow. Friday...