The Bottom Line on Who Pays

Men-If you ask her out you should pay. If you don’t know her well (met online) it is perfectly acceptable to meet for coffee or one drink. You are not expected to buy someone you don’t know a meal. It is appropriate in 2017 to have a first date be a coffee date. If a woman is offended by this I suggest you move on and see that you dodged a bullet. Ladies-You should always offer to pay your half. It is a gesture that shows him that you do not expect him to pay. It shows that you respect him and yourself enough to make the effort. When he declines your half of the money simply say thank you. Men-If you like her after the coffee date invite her to dinner and you need to pay for the dinner. You are in the courting stages and should be...

Is Your Teenager Having Sex?

I just watched an episode of Parenthood in which the teenager revealed to her mother that she was having sex. I would like to think that the reaction of the mother was just a case of poor script writing. But then I had to question whether or not all or even any parents react this way. To sum the scene up quickly, Haddie is a senior in high school and in love with her very sweet boyfriend. When she told her mother (who already knew it was happening) her mother’s face was taken over by a look of shame, she stumbled on her words and finally said “I just have no idea what to say.” She then asked her daughter a few questions about being pressured and using protection. I wonder if the intent of the writers was to offer an example of how a mother might react. I think...

To Call or Not To Call?

I am constantly hearing this question about whether or not a girl should call a guy and under what circumstances this is acceptable. 1. It is true that guys like to pursue women. These are the rules and although I don’t make them I sure do understand them. 2. It is true that if a guy is really into you and really likes you that he will call. The only exception is that he may have some kind of emotional or intimacy issues that hold him back. If that is the case then better to find out now. 3. There are guys that will have a great time on a date with you. They may laugh a lot, compliment you and even kiss you goodnight. But at the end of the date they just don’t think you are the one. Women are different. We can not possibly pretend to be interested in a guy...

I Can’t Get Over Him?

You pass his car on the street and your stomach turns to knots, you wake up in the morning and your heart sinks when there is no text message waiting on your phone from him and you have convinced yourself never to date again. It is called a heart break and I have a little news flash for you…people get over this day after day. Sure I understand you are a little special and your situation was somehow a little worse. Trust me I have been through it a million times. First thing you need to realize is that this is only as awful as you convince yourself! For some reason so many people resist believing me on this one but it is so very true! If you walk around day and night saying to yourself “I will never get over this” or “I can’t deal with the pain I am...

Ever Date This Type of Guy?

Ladies Have you Ever Dated a Guy Who… Asks you out but seems to be completely unavailable between dates? Invites you to meet him at a restaurant but isn’t clear as to whether it means dinner or drinks? Says he will call you Friday to confirm the date and when you give in and text him on Saturday he acts like it was already confirmed?  Seems interested but the relationship doesn’t seem to be escalating? If you find yourself dating this ambivalent type of guy I imagine you are pretty annoyed! You are excited that he offers to call a day ahead to confirm the date and wait anxiously for the call. Down deep you wonder why he can’t just text or say hello to you prior to the confirmation but you have rationalized this in your head. You create some ridiculous notion that he is busy with the kids or taking it slow. Friday...

Why Does Match Work For So Many But Not ME!!

Why Does Match Work for Some and Not Me? Most are going to tell you that this is because your profile looks like crap and it needs a makeover. Now for some this is a simple solution. But I think that the profile that you created is reflection of who you are, how you see yourself and what you believe you deserve. If you are wearing a sexy bikini in your picture (and you are not at the beach) you will likely attract men that are mostly thinking about having sex with you. If your profile shares too much about a past relationship that was awful you will most likely attract someone who is co-dependent and wants to rescue you (not very sexy after a while). If you are constantly bragging about yourself you will attract those who are vulnerable and naïve and believe whatever you bragged about was important. When in...

Flowers on the First Date?

Yes it is true that we love when guys do things to make us feel special! But is buying flowers on the first date a good idea? Here is my argument as to why it is simply a bad idea. We love getting flowers because it makes us feel special. But if you are buying flowers for me and you haven’t even met me it is a little weird. Do you just buy flowers for every girl you take out on a first date? If that is the case then this bouquet of roses will not make me feel special. In fact, I just might give them back to you at the end of the date so you can recycle them and give them to your date tomorrow night. It is awkward! Especially if we are meeting in a restaurant. I am stuck holding this bouquet of flowers. Even worse if it...

Which Came First… You Became Too Needy or He Became a Jerk?

Let me paint the perfect picture of how a girl comes to think she is too needy. Girl meets a great guy! They start dating. He calls and texts every day. They have sex, spend nights together, meet each other’s friends and everything is perfect. Suddenly the guy changes his behavior. The time between text messages starts to increase rapidly. He doesn’t commit to plans with you as quickly as he used to and your consistent date nights become inconsistent. You start to feel that surge of panic. And you ask yourself this ridiculous question…Am I too needy? You begin to rationalize that things progressed quickly and perhaps he just needs a little space. You fight the urge to follow up an unanswered text with a phone call and convince yourself you are being too needy. You seek advice from friends and only listen to those who are convincing you that...



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