I Can’t Get Over Him?

You pass his car on the street and your stomach turns to knots, you wake up in the morning and your heart sinks when there is no text message waiting on your phone from him and you have convinced yourself never to date again. It is called a heart break and I have a little news flash for you…people get over this day after day. Sure I understand you are a little special and your situation was somehow a little worse. Trust me I have been through it a million times.

  1. First thing you need to realize is that this is only as awful as you convince yourself! For some reason so many people resist believing me on this one but it is so very true! If you walk around day and night saying to yourself “I will never get over this” or “I can’t deal with the pain I am in” you will just keep convincing yourself and believing that this is a tragedy! So start saying other things in your head even if it hurts! Start saying “I saw the red flags and will learn from this experience” or “there is someone out there that is better for me that will treat me like I deserve”. Even if it feels like you are lying to yourself! Just say it!
  2. Remember back to worse tragedies that you have experienced and it will help put things in perspective. Especially to those who have survived divorces and custody battles. A break up is hardly even comparable to something that traumatic.
  3. Stop torturing yourself with all of the good memories. I often see women claiming that the sex and chemistry was so great! You can have great sex and chemistry with someone that doesn’t dump you or treat you like crap!
  4. To the women that keep repeating “but I was so good to him, how could he do this to me?” Perhaps your issue is that you were too good to him. If you are constantly doting over your man, cooking, cleaning, offering to pick up his dry cleaning and let his dogs out you just might be too available. These girls tend to become doormats and nothing is less sexy! Don’t beat yourself up but learn from this. All that energy you put into being a great girlfriend should be poured right back in to taking care of yourself! Sure giving is great but if you are with someone that rarely reciprocates then you just might be his doormat.
  5. Lastly, don’t ever swear off dating forever! All guys are not the same. But all the guys that you have attracted or that you gravitate towards are the same! Start changing the way you date and the choices you make and you will be amazed at how you can change your love life!


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