Breaking up!
Mar 12, 2010
So if I hear through the grapevine that a woman I’ve dated twice feels I “left her hanging” by not calling for a third date, even though I thought it was evident that the chemistry wasn’t there on the 2nd date. I’ll probably e-mail or call again. So as a woman/dating guru, do you prefer/recommend (a) a blatant statement that the chemistry isn’t there or (b) a relatively short, but nice e-mail that doesn’t ask her out again? I’ve had some hurt feelings over both kinds in past years. I’ve certainly learned that trying to discuss the reasons why there’s no chemistry is a no-no after just a few dates. (The burnt hand teaches the best)
Quite simply after 2 dates you are not required to provide a formal breakup! After 2 dates and no chemistry you just slip away. Sure the other person feels a bit sad, disappointed and rejected. But that is the world of dating. If she doesn’t ask just move on. A call or email from you will only give her a bit of false hope. If she however does send you an email and asks I would nicely say that she was a great girl just not a match for you and wish her the best! Ouch it will sting for a moment but she will be fine!
Have a great weekend.
Comments: 1
1 comments
Xavier
Jun 9, 2010
15:41:48
For this I would definitely go with telling them outright. This can eliminate any false hopes that he/she *might* call, allow the person to know they can move on (so they don’t miss any future opportunities), and also help you in learning to express your feelings so when the right one does cross your path he/she will have the benefit of someone who is upfront about how they feel.
Slipping away to me seems rather crude from either camp and doesn’t seem like a behavior very becoming of an adult human being.
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